So, at last the day arrived... The Cycle Tour. I had mixed emotions, I was so nervous, but at the same time extremely excited. I really wanted us to get a good time. My dad said we would be lucky if we got a sub 3hours 45 minutes, but I really wanted us to do a 3hour 15 minute time.
The morning of we woke up at 04h20. We got dressed, ate a small breakfast and headed to the race. Before we knew it, it was 06h40 and the gun went off for our group D start. For some reason the start killed me. I thought that I seriously might not make it, but then we went past UCT and I saw all my wonderful and most beautiful friends and suddenly I felt stronger... until Wynberg hill. We raced so hard, we pushed ourselves to our limits, but I had the most amazing race. We had perfect weather conditions and it made me realize just how beautiful our country really is. In the end we did the race in 3 hours 13 minutes and 57 seconds. We were thrilled!!!
This last week has been really tough for me, the reality of everything I have got to do is finally hitting me and for this week I really buckled under the pressure. I have gotten through it though and it will keep getting better, I just have to work really hard and keep remembering what my goals are.
One more thing on my list is complete. And I have continued spending time in kommetjie, been working hard toward my SACAP qualification and been taking my camera to capture moments.
For the long weekend The family went to Britania Bay. It is so beautiful and relaxing and I had the most wonderful time with my family. It is the times like those that make me really appreciate everything I have and make the things I don't have seem truly unimportant.
This week ahead is going to be busy and as far it it looks, so is this entire year. It's not always going to be easy, but I'm up for the challenge!
So, the month of February has ended and I must admit that I lost a bit of focus this month. I have kept up with my exercise routine going to yoga, going to gym, running and cycling weekly. The Argus is next week and I couldn't be more excited. I am going to give it everything I have, I have been working so hard for it and it deserves me to give it everything. Besides, its only 3 hours and a few minutes of everything.
Everything is still going well at SACAP, I have my first assignment due next week and another the next week. These I have not started yet, but I plan to get on it today.
Work is going well. I still love my kids and really enjoy the responsibility and keeping busy. It gives me a purpose and those 2 kids make my day, everyday.
My Physical Science stuff still has yet to arrive in the post, it is supposed to arrive this week and then my Physical Science will at last commence.
I have spend a lot of time in Kommetjie this month, visiting gran, going there for Valentines day and for the 21st. I even plan on going there today. I need Kommetjie to sort out my mind, its the only place that can.
I did not get to see my favourite teacher this month for coffee, but we did have a chat. I plan on seeing her for coffee very soon.
I have just purchased the new Nigella Lawson "Kitchen" cookbook and I look forward to diving into it. Nigella is the woman I always seem to turn to when I feel crushed. She always helps to pull me out.
My saving for my Mac Laptop is going according to schedule.
I did not enter the lottery again in February, but i plan on most definitely doing it this month.
No. 51 on my list was achieved in February. It was magic... for me at least.
It was Lisa's birthday on Wednesday and it was a perfect evening. I love driving with them, eating ice-cream and sushi with them, but most of all... I love taking photographs with them. I hope your day was magical Lisa*
It turns out that my little taste of magic was confusing. My little taste of magic didn't go anywhere. I don't really understand what happened. The date he took me on was magic once again, it surprised me how relaxed we were in each others company, how natural everything was with us. There was talk of other things we needed to do together, other dates we would go on, but after goodbye things changed.
I didn't anticipate it at all. To me, everything was more perfect than I could have expected it to be. Every detail keeps running through my mind as to what I did wrong, why he doesn't seem to like me enough to want to get hold of me, to want to see me again as much as I want to see him.
The worst part of it all is that I thought I had finally gotten lucky. I thought that after all the trauma and heartbreak I had been through with guys that I had finally gotten lucky and found a great guy that treated me how I had always deserved to be treated. And now there is nothing and I am left so confused and worse off than I was before I had met him.
I guess the lesson I learned is that magic, no matter how beautiful, is still a sacrifice. The sacrifice is to let every fear you have go and just enjoy the magic, but sometimes magic doesn't last as long as you think it will and you need to let it go, no matter how impossible it may seem. It's difficult to let something go when in your mind there is not enough reason to, when you still cling on to a tiny string of hope that things will suddenly change. The hardest part, is letting go of the hope.
